can anyone tell me?

i have high grade 3/3 muscle invasive bladder cancer with other cancer in situ in my bladder , and a lymph coming up in my left groin area. i really would like some very honest answers if anyone knows if i go ahead and have rc surgery- i have read about people having the surgery and still die within the year- what are my chances of living longer with the surgery? am i just going to go thru all that , just to buy myself a little bit of agonizing time? i believe that when they cut you open , the oxygen gets to the cancer, and it spreads faster- is this true? please help and answer me, i believe in quality of life. i have things i want to do before i start feeling sick. does anyone know how long before i start feeling sick? ct scan in sept.09 showed the tumor , 2 turbt's in late nov. early dec 09. no treament since. had surgery scheduled jan.2010, anethesia stopped it until i have a stress echo test, which is this friday. surgery is schedualed for feb. 4, 2010. i am thinking of a clinical trial or radiation. any input is greatly needed. i'm having trouble deciding , because i DO want quality of life.

Linda Troxell Author